CHAPTER 2 (WORKED UP OVER NOTHING)
I made my way home thinking about how this would be my first step to attaining self-actualization. I should have been in the school hostel or should have rented an apartment nearby, but let’s just say my parents do not have my time yet.
I got home, went straight to my room prepared the mix I was going to send to the ear-pierced guy. I didn’t even bother to get his name, this was one of my bad habits, I never really like getting to know people. I’ve been keeping to myself for so long that I don’t bother because I know they areere not going to be around for long. I think my issue with people started with my parents’ neglect, how I was never good enough for them, and how they focused all their attention on my sister. In school my sister also outshone me. Did I mention that we are a twin? I have always been picked on by bullies, so I created a defense mechanism to just withdraw from people. The saying “If they don’t get close to you, they can’t hurt you” has been my motto.
I sent the mix to an email which firstname.lastname@example.org. But first, why would someone’s email be “death to all”??This was just too creepy, my thoughts started running wild, maybe he was in a cult, he works at a night club he definitely would be trouble. I was still trying to calm myself down when my sister walked in.
“Hey, did you have classes today??” she slammed the door and landed on my bed
“Obviously”. I opened a new tab on my laptop, not looking at her
“You looking good today” she grinned at me
“What?” That didn’t sound right to my ears. For the past few years, there has been a weird sexual tension between my sister, and I have been trying to bury this feeling, but my sister wasn’t helping matters. Like, she constantly flirted with me.
“I said you look nice”. She still maintained the grin on her face.
“What?” I looked confused.
“I mean, I would totally bang you right now, just saying”. Now she started laughing.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?” I said now laughing too, even though I try as much as possible to shut down the flirting, I kind of enjoyed it and she knew I did.
“So there is a freshers’ party happening in school, do you want to come?”
“Okay?” I was a little skeptical about these parties, because I don’t know anyone, and who am I going to dance with? I’m also a terrible dancer
“Come on! this might be your chance to get that thing of yours wet”, she smiled.
“And our parents think you are a saint”, I said perplexed
“Whatever, you are coming and that’s it”,she said, walking out of my room.
She always had a way of getting me to do whatever she wanted, she always led while I followed. This pissed off my parents and I think that’s why she was their favorite. My dad would always say “don’t you know you are the man?” I never fully understood what he meant by that.
The night came, I reluctantly decided to follow my sister to the party and of course she brought her A game. She wore a bum short with a crop top. Every guy there was staring and she loved the attention she was getting.
“Hey, I’m about to leave you alone now”, my sister said, smiling at the guys who had been eyeing her.
“Feyi, now you going to leave me” I tried guilt tripping her.
“Don’t do that, better go and have fun” she snapped back at me, resisting my attempt to make her feel guilty .
So I was in the middle of a party, I had no idea what to do. Just why did I let my sister talk me into coming here? I did not understand anymore; everyone was having fun except me.
“Hey” A hand landed on my shoulders, I turned back and saw ear piercing guy
“What’s up?” I tried to look cool
“So I listened to your mix”, I didn’t miss the disappointment on his face.
“And?” I asked, like I already knew what he was going to say.
” I did not like it, it’s okay but not good enough. I mean, we are talking about getting people to forget about their worries and get lost in the music, I am looking at getting people to make mistakes that they are going to regret when they are sober but they won’t care. I mean can you listen to the DJplaying? And can you see the people? This is what I’m talking about, music is a weapon and you have to know how to use it” he spoke staring down at me
” I understand what you mean” I couldn’t maintain eye contact with him, it felt like I was being scolded by my dad.
“But don’t worry man, I’m going to teach you how to live, but first, let’s party”, he said, smiling at me.
“Alright”, I said, reluctantly.
“So tell me what kind of girls do you like?” He grinned at me.
“Any kind” I sounded confused.
“Okay?” He gave me a wicked smile
He turned to the girl in front of us and tapped her
“Hey, I’m kelvin” he kept his grin
“Hello?” The girl looked confused
” C’mon, don’t be scared, what’s your name?” He kept his gaze on her like he was trying to intimidate her on purpose.
“What? why would I be scared? My name is Josephine” I could see she was trying to hide the fact that that she was intimidated.
” Josephine…. what?” He said in a commanding tone, I was pretty sure the girl felt offended
She giggled “Josephine Adewunmi”
This was really getting interesting and confusing.
“Okay Josephine, do you know this guy here?” He pointed at me.
What the fuck was he doing? I did not ask for him to set me up, what was I going to say? I had no idea of what to do
The girl stared hard at me “No, I don’t think so”
“Alright, you are?” he signaled me to say my name
“Folarin” I said smiling
“Oh I like the song” he turned the girls back towards him and they started grinding. I could not just believe it; it can’t be that easy?
I walked round the party looking for someone to dance with, I was too shy to walk up to the girls and the ones I summoned courage to talk to turned away from me in disgust.
The party was over, my sister and I got home, I narrated what had happened to her, she laughed at the whole thing and almost choked on her laughter.
Soon everywhere became silent. She then moved closer to me and grabbed my little man and started fiddling it, I was shocked but I didn’t have the power to do anything. I was paralyzed.
“You need to get this thing wet, getting it wet will give you confidence, and that’s all you need with girls”. She adjusted her hand to accommodate the bulge in my trousers.
She fiddled with it for a while, gave me a little kiss on my cheek, and left me standing in awe.